HaitianNation25

adz:

adz:

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went to the cop slide and got yelled at by a cop

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@solardrifter the park is closed i think but also it’s being patrolled by people who hate fun

trans-seraphim:

egberts:

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everyone say thanks to the four bears that gave you autism today

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tastefullyoffensive:

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Such a drama queen.

fishing-lesbian-catgirl:

The “Open in App” button was out there to taunt you. it sends you to the app store even though you already own the app and it will never let you see the post on your phone browser. they do this because they hate yoy

mortimer:

ibuprofen please save me from the dragon

litttlestars:

i think names are such a delicate thing and we dont say each other’s names enough bc why else does it strike such a chord in me when ppl say my name as if i actually exist

meowsapow:

meowsapow:

“Friends with benefits” and the benefit is being my friend :)

We can also fuck nasty or whatever

adz:

adz:

adz:

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went to the cop slide and got yelled at by a cop

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@solardrifter the park is closed i think but also it’s being patrolled by people who hate fun

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bro this quote made it into the boston globe 🥲

currentlycryingaboutlancelot:

currentlycryingaboutlancelot:

big fan of shakespeare villains who step onto the stage and immediately announce “I am here and I am evil. I am here to do mischief.” and then that’s exactly what they do for the next two hours. no other motive is ever explained. at the end they fail. kings

people keep tagging this ‘fernando alonso’ and i was like who tf is that???? so I looked it up and he’s a race car driver. from spain. so, for sure my favorite shakespeare character

grandtheftflora-again:

sleepy-bebby:

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Company: is this okay?

That extremely online employee:

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fairycosmos:

god i love coming home and being at home and sitting inside my home and staying home

calamity-unlocked:

were–ralph:

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Sometimes twitter be hitting

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This is even funnier with context attached

reallybadblackoutpoems:

cornandcoconutsoup:

reallybadblackoutpoems:

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text from my dad (2021) - my dad

“i’ll admit that my main problem with this is that i haven’t asked”

submitted by @cornandcoconutsoup

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Original text for context

op this provides no context